depression

Just beyond, the sun is shining, children are playing, lovers mingle, the old feel young, tiny moments live large, excitement fills the air.
Moving on a long time now.
Been moving on in the snow.
The world is grey.
Step by step, the progress is slow.
The white flakes are an ocean on my shoulder.
Up to my neck, a spec in the vast expanse.
Bobbing, suspended in the current.
Darkness falls, dragged to and fro.
Squinting into the face of the deep.
I’m told my savor’s in that void.
My thoughts prowl in the shadows
an insatiable hunger for my harm.
Even my good deeds are toxic.
I’m afraid to fade.
Close, open.
Back to the snow.
Step by step uncertainty crackles below.
Row upon row of asbestos homes
on into the cold
and nowhere to go.
Dope would fix this, if it could fool me twice.
What is it all for?
Is it really better out there?
And just beyond, the sun is shining, children are playing, lovers mingle, the old feel young, tiny moments live large, excitement fills the air.